My little man, S, came home from preschool telling me that one of his friends asked him to be mean to a little girl in class because that little girl did something mean to "friend." When I asked S what he did, he told me (proudly) that he called his classmate a "meany" but then apologized and tried to get all three of them to play a game together. It worked.
Too often (more often than I am ever willing to admit) I repeat to myself, "What goes around, comes around." Ok, well, that is not such a bad thought, right? What is not so graceful of me is when I want to help said attacker feel that "comes around" part a little quicker, like sticking my foot out nonchalantly as that person walks by or getting the last word, even if it ends with the tone "na.na.na.na.boo.boo." I have witnessed and experienced the saying from both ends, but when I have just been treated unfairly or watch as another person, stranger or not, being treated unfairly, I want to give it right back in a passive-aggressive sort of way. 99% of the time I do not, but boy, do I think about it!
No wonder today's youth feel so confused and conflicted. We teach (and practice) kindness and helpfulness and want no good deed to be left unrewarded, but then expect the bad to just roll off. Except of course, if you are being bullied. Then stand up for yourself and your friends and family or a stranger while simultaneously practicing the cliche, what goes around, comes around.
Be a leader. Set the right expectations. Set the right boundaries.
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